I always fall inlove, knowing its going to hurt me. I fell inlove with the feeling of pain ever since my momma birthed me. Depression, aggression, mental enslavement, i love the oppression. We love what we know, and i never got to meet the feeling of affection...
How the *** can somebody love me when i dont love myself. U tell me u love me, i can tell that u lyin, but i still dont trust myself. I listen, i watch, and im peeping ur actions. My emotions got kidnapped, and got taken for ransom.
Emotional paralysis, i no longer get nervous. I feel like I'll hurt u if i fake when im flirting. My mind out the gutter, its back to the business. I get women to talk, but i never do listen.
I dont like to feel love, cuz that feeling is jaded. I been hurt so much that i wonder how i made it. I think to myself "how much more can i take". Till i wake up n remember im inlove with the pain...
Hii Yella
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Fatal Attraction
CATEGORY
romance
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COMMENTS
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hymnagen says: this is a banging journey. I digz the twists and turns of your word play. Bravo |
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Woven says: The pace of this alone is outstanding, and your expression...to function we become one with our pain. Perhaps if love is accepted piecemeal, it will begin to feel normal. Awesome write. |
OTHER POEMS WRITTEN BY Hii Yella
Our Counterparts (Ballad to Our Queens)I love u like i love the full moon in a dark city. I love u like i love comfort in a world so gritty... Determined, determined, in a world full hate. Assurance emerged inside me to stay... Bruthas claim tough, bruthas claim that we hard. But really our sistas is harder than we are. We fall for the trap, we get stuck in the world. They achieve and believe, and find the bless in the curse. Our women go to college while the men go to prison. We fall into the trap, while they stick to their mission. We get side tracked by the trap,but they stick to they vision. They tell us and help us, we hard headed, dont listen... My sistas my sistas, please i beg u forgive us. We subject ourselves as s, and we callin u es... How ? Why? How ? Why??.... So many sistas in college, with degrees, and dont need licks... Shiiit, where im from bruthas need more degrees and some speed sticks😂😂😂.. Although they independent, sistas want us to help. They want a counterpart, if they dont ...  |
My 2nd EnlightenmentMy first trip through reality was a tough one. Learning to only love few and trust none. I was told but didnt listen, much like most of our children. Im guilty of breaking the code, and i accept my conviction... (let me explain...) I loved u when i met u, and the feeling seemed mutual. I kept quiet because i knew its best to stay neutral. I dont get it, u feel in my arms just the way i was hoping. Naturally i became vulnerable, and my emotions were open. U were beefin with ur momma and u left for a while. U came back, naturally i involuntarily smiled... At the time i was beginning my transition from the lockness. Meaning lost in the sea, to being woken and conscious. Found out she found another man, from her neck of the woods. Who shared her mindstate bout being trapped in the hood. Im no longer an active crip, trynna change into good. I say its funny how life work cuz now she *** with a blood. Shes addicted to hard livin, loves to *** with a thug. Thats ok cuz ill lo... |
Fatal AttractionI always fall inlove, knowing its going to hurt me. I fell inlove with the feeling of pain ever since my momma birthed me. Depression, aggression, mental enslavement, i love the oppression. We love what we know, and i never got to meet the feeling of affection... How the *** can somebody love me when i dont love myself. U tell me u love me, i can tell that u lyin, but i still dont trust myself. I listen, i watch, and im peeping ur actions. My emotions got kidnapped, and got taken for ransom. Emotional paralysis, i no longer get nervous. I feel like I'll hurt u if i fake when im flirting. My mind out the gutter, its back to the business. I get women to talk, but i never do listen. I dont like to feel love, cuz that feeling is jaded. I been hurt so much that i wonder how i made it. I think to myself "how much more can i take". Till i wake up n remember im inlove with the pain... |