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I think much and do ponder
About the here now, and the yonder
And consequently
I recognize that evidently
I’ve been tenaciously strikingly striving
Working hard so meticulously
Laboriously been studiously practicing
My emotional stains I must get them removed spiritually surgically
My past pain is still hurting me
Disastrously gruesomely
People do say things supposedly
Acting and speaking authentically
But not always factually
And so basically
I continue to be tactful militarily
This world is so distracting me
But to God I say thankfully
He gave me a mind that works tactically
And yet tragically
I lose any sort of tranquility
But extreme personality is almost always leaving me terminally
My humor is kind of living timelessly
I work distrustingly tirelessly
Not really ever trustfully
Although I am trustworthy
I’m not offering anyone an ounce of my ‘trusting’ see!
I believe I am unbeatably combative
As I receive punishment from past lives retroactive
I guess inevitably
I am not perfect but kind of speak unerringly
Spewing my thoughts out prolifically
Especially and specifically
To be known as a gifted lyricist
Who takes words and twists this
And also whom writes so dynamically
I am cautious but can speak quite amicably
I know it will take me a while
To find a way to reconcile
Clean out the grout
From my emotional tile
It may take me a while
But in the end
I may be able to alter my emotional and psychological style
And if not
Then I at least was willing to walk that green mile
And it will be recorded and documented as a top secret file
My future life
I may be in denial
I may even be placed onto trial
But I will then be rebooted and refreshed
And look back on how I was able to impress
So I must now take time to confess
That for thirty four years
I have had nothing but stress & distress
My whole life’s been a Mess
I wish I could say less
As much as I tried to progress
All I did was digress
To my old version of me
I hope I do not ever regress
Cause I was hateful and spiteful
And to me being enraged was being delightful
But that old me, has been oppressed
And I found a way to suppressed
He spoke and acted so wickedly sadistically
Many minds and souls had been scattering
Many women’s hearts I was shattering
Due to my emotional, psychological and spiritual battering
I thought it was quite flattering
My complexity was simplicity
I lived a life so intrinsically
Became a man engulfed with the world metaphysically
Lost my place geo-physically
Sort of was like a man who walked spiritlessly
I thought I was the over man, who walked superhumanly
I never did much hesitatingly
I thought I did all things amazingly terrifically
Was prompt because I did all things expeditiously
Used to desire to be known televisually
The thought used to torment me
It almost won me triumphantly
The pain of such strain in my heart and brain as it was my food for grain
Was always horrifying me
Truly signifying to me
Mystifyingly trying to better the me, inside of me!
I found a way to justifyingly justify
A way to indescribably work harder, and try it see?!
I thought my current emotional state was unattainable
I never knew I had the power to turn the table
My life was always just pertaining
I thought I was completely self-sustaining
But now I know, that God was restraining
He was continuously and perpetually having me in training
His punishment he kept on refraining
Until the time was ripe in my life
In which it would always be raining
Then it became much more than emotionally draining
His presence was highly unexpected
But my Lord God, I trust and respected
He told me that he created me
A tad bit hesitatingly
But gave to me
A higher ability
A greater sensibility
Born with a certain level of spiritual volition
Transparent in kindness
But He said I can change my condition
I didn’t have to be a man of anger, hate or sedition
So His ultimate contribution
Was my earthly solution
To let go of my think type pollution
Watered it down enough to be considered dilution
He then did admonish
That in my future I would be astonished
That if He chose to just have me vanquished
Or he could teach me His spiritual language
I then lost all inhibition
I let go of my hate and thoughts of sedition
But it was only granted under just one condition
That I would not utilize my new gained insight
To be a powerful imposition
And try to create a cosmic inquisition
Thus those words flow in my head with such repetition
And at times, there are some intellectual thoughts of opposition
But the truth is
That my souls recognition
Is that it is still in the process of a great spiritually cosmic and metaphysical transition
God gives me lyrical ability as my ammunition
And daily he gives me power to replenish and have yet another reignition!
I now know that I have no limitation
Because God is in me and has me in the process of preparation
With out the need for sedation
He now dwells in my hearts throne and abode
He now gives me repose
Without having to impose
Thus I’m now much more powerfully able
To write down thoughts and compose
Without the power behind the words to ever decompose
I have been blessed with the power of flows
That can elevate and help others grow
So they too could know
That at the end of the day
It is God who writes, produces, and directs all of lifes shows!
Now I will not try to persuade
But I neither will try to dissuade
My writing is my skill and my trade
If you believe and follow God, great!
But if you don’t
There’s no need for a tirade
But just recognize
For every soul that comes to God in humility
There is a heavenly parade!
SkTzO
