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Too immature for the raw.
Falsely reassured by the tally of miscarries.
Never considering possibilities not quite as remote as had been hoped.
Not even sure THAT was true, subconsciously.
Had it been?
Probably acting more responsibly would have been the resultant behavior.
Feels differently when heads are over heals!
Sh!t is real when mind, heart and body all feel mathematics in action:
Living out the product of reciprocal fractions betwixt aerobically heated linens where sapien beginnings are rooted;
saturated by warm she-bodily fluids like exercised attire – enough to quench the fires of man’s carnal desires – there, where sapien beginnings are rooted and were.
Remiss, not pondering,”IF gestation occurs?”
and the “THEN” that man-age-meant is Dee-Man-did.
Out offered and begrudgingly accepted.
Later regretted.
Nearly irreparably emotionally affected.
Recessive man-whore-ish tendencies reckless-ly explored.
Toyed with she-feelings ignored.
Ultimately self-abhorred.
Wounds healed in cliché-ic fashion.
Math done again – make up exams for better scores.
Overcompensation for an earlier accepted offer can make a man a model worthy of role emulation, hence the label applied,
but that math was based upon the two-timed table.
“How you get ‘em is how you lose ‘em.”
Real talk; words of wisdom.
Infidelity far less painful than the bruising of separating role and model’s union.
So a-whoring-he-will-go
reluctantly Deuce Bigalowed for a year
then disappeared through relocation.
Studied mathematic problems and solved one,
but the solution to that first, real equation still elusive
while the fear of being incorrect is haunting
rediscovery of Ex as the unknown variable
renews the wanting for the serenity of knowing.
-HymnAgen
