Chest caving in
All of this stress that I'm breathing in
Got me surprised that I'm breathing still
Fighting the urge to have a drink and a sleeping pill
Never suicidal
But fighting hard for survival
Got a purpose to live for
But the more that I live, seems like I got too much to die for
I stay hyped up for a reason
Cause different problems come with every season
Had to stop daydreaming and realize
That the fairytale story in the sky.....
Don't exist unless you get high
The room is spinning again, heart beating so fast
Feels like I'll never see the light again
My body drugless, but I feel the pain in my system
Side effects of a broken fam, broken hope and low income
But still I say I'm blessed
Cause I've seen some pretty moments
Still got life in my body and only a short list of regrets
I just anticipate what's coming up
I'm trying everything I can think of to progress but it's never enough
Money's always an issue
They say more money more problems.....
I find that hard to believe compared to all the broke that I been through
Mental health at stake
Sanity driven off the deep end with every breathe that I take
But the brilliant ideas in my mind need a way to escape
A breakthrough to break through this prison that my fear creates
I just want my smile back
To feel happy and successful
To feel capable like I did awhile back
I just want my time back
To correct some things and change my mind before it's too late and I'm thrown off track
Chest caving in
Hyperventilating, losing control again
This out of body experience got me begging to feel my being again
Feel like I'm losing my soul when I'm straining to see the light again
This feeling visits me more often than my peace of mind
I feel anxiety taking over again
To be continued......