1700
Tears, fear, anxiety
Growth, disappointment, concern
......and I STILL waited
You drug me by my heart
Grabbed onto my soul and continued to pull
Scraping my surface and bruising my mind I stood weakly
Facing my only two options
Leave or stay
Leave and break love
Stay and wait for love
There was no preparation
No warning
The decision was wrapped around my neck
Choking me lifeless
Either way I would end up losing a part of me
A part of my life I waited....
Wondering and seeking information that wasn't available for me
Gasping for reasons, falling at the thoughts
I never thought I would be put into this position
Unwillingly and helpless
You overlooked what you had
Assuming it would always be here
Looks like you were right
But how long will I stay, will I wait through the most torturing compromise of my life
Damaged and hopeful
Your visit soothed me
Until I uncovered infidelity
Until I realized I was sharing a visit with another woman
Do I belong here?
Waiting?
Or does she?
Was I meant to walk away
Leaving what I thought I needed
Only to find something that was destined for me without sneaky terms and pressed contracts
Without cursed love
Open minded, trying, coping
Weeping, hoping, desiring
Counting down I am still waiting....
For the distance to form a closure
For my questions to find an answer
For my mind to know why you will never love me like I love you
For the heaviness of desperation to stop crushing me
For my eyes to stop bleeding intensely from seeing the piercing truth
For all of these reasons.....
But really for what?
Why am I waiting, still?
For a love that can't love me simply or complex
For a man who sees my glowing soul but can't match it
For a person who doesn't understand why I get tired of waiting....
If I let go of this ledge now I can fall for eternity in a void of possibilities
I can explore parts of my heart that were never occupied I can roam and be hurt but still move on
Because the pain I have endured in this love is untouchable
There is no greater pain
Than waiting......
Through time so precious
Moments un-met
People never introduced
Peace never found
Happiness never retrieved.....
No, there is no greater pain than waiting....
Just to find out that you'll always be waiting
Just to end up waiting for nothing
