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To keep myself from falling,
I must write, I must release, this ugly
inner beast from choking the life from my emotions
I can't focus,
I'm possessed with the guilt of my transgressions,
I feel held down to bed, not able to even
stretch my legs....
Constantly thinking of an out,
But my mind refuse to show me the answers,
Guilt, and shame is what it's giving me
Screaming at me, taunting me with truths,
Reinforcing the clear fact of me being the very worst
enemy,
I'll ever come across on a battle field...
I swear to you, I kill,
myself in mind murders,
Strangling the life from my emotions with remorse,
Running from a guilt headless demon on a horse...
Somehow I can't escape,
I've learned of the dreams we " humans" live,
I just don't know how the Hell do I wake,
How do I look all this sh**t in the face?
How do I not wake up in the morning with the most heaviest feeling
of disgrace?
it's just so much sh*t I can't even bring myself to face
I couldn't even deliver the exact words in a poem,
Cause the list is way to long,
My head spins, as alphabets transform into scorn,
although I run from the self -abuse,
I still daily water
it's negative roots...
Joining in a deadly cahoots, to block
my soul from reaching the complete truth
Which is now weakening my frame,
my only banister at this moment is the words I write,
which is the only force that's keeping me from falling...
