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I look back and regret my many chosen mistakes
The many hearts I did break
The frowns I’ve placed upon more than one face
Just because I was feeling out of place
Out of pace
I always felt kind of displaced.
I became an act of disgrace.
And for far too long
I was weak wishing to be strong
I nearly broke down and died
With my own strength I forced my desire to try
Felt denied, lost my pride
I did more than just cry
When I realized that I hated who I saw
When I viewed myself in the reflection
God made me have a moment of detection
I saw a disgusting evil infection
Growing
Stopped me from growing
Stunted me from showing
Those that I truly felt for
I was unable to show that I did adore
My regrets of the past
Were strong enough to pass
Passed down to the present moment
My tears are nearly impossible to hold it.
I let go of God many times
Denied Him from my mind
Made me more than blind
Kept me so confined
Made me less inclined
But then I had declined
Straightened myself & sat up reclined.
For the pain was worse than a million souls crying out to me in agony.
Who could make me hurt so much – if not I, myself & me?
Knowing that most of my pain
Was made up in my brain
And for too long I just complained
Of my physical stress & strain
And yet here I remain.
More than ready to stand up against those that are wicked.
Cold hearted wicked souls with one way ticket.
They can waste their time pointing fingers or try to destroy your small heavenly snippet.
But theirs is a destroyed conscience in which they could never have a true home
With a fence that’s white & picket.
So shut it and erase your mental rage
And destroy your destitute spiritual stage and emotional phase.
Let go of the chains gripping tighter to your brain
Because you keep puling each end into either direction
Pressing the brain to no longer self sustain nor self-sustain
But a piece of grey matter is what shall remain
Unless you let go of the thoughts of negativity that still linger and remain
Let them go for all they do is hold you
They sold you
I already told you
God is doing what He must to mold you
And in the process
There will be times
In which He himself will hold you
Bend you up and fold you
Just so that the oil of the tree which is your soul will be pressed outward
Outward for the world to taste of your oil
So prepare to be touched up and boiled
Your psychology is the soil
So work meticulously and eternally toil
Because in order to catapult forward
God must take your body up and coil.
Coil it - to then let it spring to the top!
The stove is now hot
The water is boiling in the pot
The old version of you should now almost be ready to rot
The new you will awaken on a white linen cot
With fresh clothing and a new beginning
A new world for conversion
Where there is nothing but peace, joy & grinning
For the old world of pain, destruction, wickedness & sinning
Shall be past
And if you awoke to this story
Then you were strong enough to out last
For the new you in energy
Its expansion is immense & vast
And there will only be one you
So no more multiple versions of your mind have to forever fight & clash.
SkTzO
