The best of both worlds was what i thought to be the only lie my mother ever told me..
Until she SHOWED me, the only way to LOVE myself, is for myself to actually KNOW me... Let me explain...
My white mother, was a white mother (obviously), and any woman HER SELF knows that its hard to RAISE A MAN.
How in the HELL could it be any easier to raise a different RACE of man?...
I had no clue who i was, or what my last name was supposed to be, where my ancestors are from.
I had no sense of power or knowledge, no role models, just questions i thought i could answer with guns ...
Fighting for RESPECT... The thing a man cherishes so deeply within his own community...
NOT KNOWING fighting MY BROTHERS, is what the 'u know who' wanted, and so i developed an immunity...
U can show me movies and shows of brothers chained up all u want, We know alllll about it...
But when yall put WHITE faces on MY ancestors, u look at me funny for shouting....
All lives matter till a black man is shot down...
A black man is not a slave with no chains, WE KINGS WITH LOST CROWNS.
How the HELL can any of yall be able to hate yourself.. Im done rhyming lets be real now... How do we kill a "" dead but run from the police ?? Bruthas... Put the guns down and read... We were royalty.... Im just as guilty as any other young brutha in the hood for being misguided... Give guidance... We only do what we know... My half sister is white with blonde hair and blue eyes. She loved hanna montana.. She loved justin beiber... Because she can IDENTIFY with them.. Be the one these kids can identify with, cuz being a "trap negro" is putting THE NEGRO IN A TRAP. U might as well call ur self a house .... Im done here...
Hii Yella
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OTHER POEMS WRITTEN BY Hii Yella
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My Soul Grows Dim...I dont laugh like i used to, my eyes used to be light. Im Depressed but i repress it to move on with my life. I used to joke alot, and most considered me bright. I couldnt see how, as these voids absorbin my sight. I was a child, biting my fingers, biting my nails. Biting the skin off my lips, and twirked my hair. Anxiety filled, but most would say that its different. Cuz how would a 5 year old ever be stressin? Heart breaks from outsiders never hurt me or break me. I always felt depression, but heart ache re awakes it. I laugh when i stub my toe, i laugh when i slip and fall. Hysterical when u push me over, and whenever i get hit, i scoff. A slave, so used to the pain i start to enjoy it. So even when im free, i ask the same master for employment... A repetitious cycle, expect no pitty, just trifle. I never expected them to do me like they did michael... Vick? For false accusations, of something he never created? Jordan? Becoming the greatest but lettin outsiders ch... |
I Come to You as a SinnerThe smile i used to have was so innocent and so prescious. Which later turned to battle scars and a mug of aggression. I taught myself to hold a pen, before school and my lessons. I hold it a bit different, journals full of confessions.. Went to school, the teacher told us draw whatever we think. I drew a small brown boy with a crown to be a king. The teacher looked confused and asked me who could that be. I found it quite obvious as i told her its me. She told us write a story on whatever we want. I wrote a passage on step daddy who was beatin my arm. I always had a smile, so innocent and so chippa. Till the first day i heard somebody call me a . What turned from a rare event to a daily routine. I went from good grades to skippin school, with the ones on my team. Same kids i used to ride bikes with on the trail ! Who woulda thought the only time we write was sending letters to jail ! Sleepin on some couches, with the bugs and the mouses. Kept a weapon i wont speak on... |
Letter to "Dad"I wanna call u pops, but i never even seen u. We spoke on the phone but u act like i need u. The truth of the matter, dont care if i meet u. Cuz now im grown, where was u when i need u? U fix cars, u can build computers? U got all these degrees, but i need a tutor... U pissed me off and i hope that u know it. Before i sold drugs i was shovelin snow and I taught MYSELF how to read and write. I taught MYSELF how to ride a bike. And i didnt learn till i was nine. Cuz kids would laugh when i fell off mine. A feelin of hurt, i cant cleanse with the pastor. It aint hurt me before, the effects had came after. My friends did sports, they dads taught em how tackle. While Everybody in my neighborhood was callin me a bastard. *** the positions, im not worried bout those. The reason i learned much later than most. Is cuz i had to go out in the world all alone. And learn FOR MYSELF or my life come aclosed. I had friends shot, i had friends die. Cops kicked my door at the age of... |
Me? ... Who ?The best of both worlds was what i thought to be the only lie my mother ever told me.. Until she SHOWED me, the only way to LOVE myself, is for myself to actually KNOW me... Let me explain... My white mother, was a white mother (obviously), and any woman HER SELF knows that its hard to RAISE A MAN. How in the HELL could it be any easier to raise a different RACE of man?... I had no clue who i was, or what my last name was supposed to be, where my ancestors are from. I had no sense of power or knowledge, no role models, just questions i thought i could answer with guns ... Fighting for RESPECT... The thing a man cherishes so deeply within his own community... NOT KNOWING fighting MY BROTHERS, is what the 'u know who' wanted, and so i developed an immunity... U can show me movies and shows of brothers chained up all u want, We know alllll about it... But when yall put WHITE faces on MY ancestors, u look at me funny for shouting.... All lives matter till a black m... |
The Black TreeI was not lynched, nor was i whipped. Yet how did the FEELING of liberty get stripped? My branches, broken, my roots have been ripped. Yet happy, because the DREAM of success had me convinced,- That maybe I'm crazy to believe that WE are mentally handicapped... Im seen as racist when I speak on our liberties, rights, and ASK if WE may have them back.. I am the son of Tupac, and nephew of Huey Newton. A light skinned Malcom X, but was lost for a LONG time, puzzled, and looking foolish... I asked before, how did the FEELING of liberty, get stripped... I educated myself to find we NEVER had Liberty in ANY KIND of realistic sense. WHO are u to say go home, as if YOU were here first?.. Im stumped, but you WILL NOT pull my roots from out this earth. A mixed breed, who was thought to be some house negro.... They burnt EVERY LAST TWIG of my heritage... but yall still wanna shoot some free throws.. Smh.. 19 years is a short life, and short time, and Im TIRED of alll ... |