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Aye ham married to a banshee demoniacal fitbit frosty hoar, whose patience she doth pull.
Daily egg gone e, this hen pecked husband relentlessly endures.
Twenty four friggin hours, and seven days a week (dip peal doth crow), when morning hath broken til the stroke of hell low hissing kitty at night, this mister mom must endure the relentless onslaught of un beak able string of expletives (purportedly as endearments - argh), and bombardment of dried out rock hard leftovers.
I cannot go anywhere inside this nor outside for peace of body, mind and spirit from a nattering wife who folded, mutilated and spindled every square inch of this slender older papa bear. Every now and again, he futilely lashes out.
Rather than set a whirled wide web of escalating altercation, he does his level best be stair clear of retaliating with outright full bore artillery, which consists of burnt offerings that closely resemble bupkis.
Said shrewish sh rude, and torturous spouse maintains a stockpile of cannon fodder, edible, and unappetizing palm size petrified attempts culinary delight, when they best served as ammunition per the war against terrorism.
No doubt they could foil any tinderbox of subversive anarchistic activity, yet can keep complex edifices of infrastructure intact.
Take heed and do not enter the kitchen here at landmine lane, a most dangerous zone whereby ye may risk life and limb.
This message typed from a contemplative, introspective, perceptive, and restive father (addressed voluntarily as "Sir Aye Sic" by thee eldest daughter) severely injured countless instances, when thine irascible wife unexpectedly lobbed a fusillade of brickbat like bombs of her botched breakfast for chimp peons to be caged.
This message painstakingly penned while bandaged head to toes from major contusions (more deadly than any rocket propelled grenade) whose dire straits necessitates calling Magellan Health care, which lack of emotional, physical and spiritual succor would spell the demise, thus rendering irrelevant a bode Chan ill for recovery.
That life changing comedy of errors tragedy (essentially mush ado a boot nut tin for this Lear re: King) continues to replay itself in my mind manifold times ex post facto.
Thus a quest for a discrete liaison came by way of an emancipated fluked, gamed handed, and inspired jousted kindling online phone sex with a bodacious, delicious, and fabulous older woman of color.
Telephone shenanigans with my attempt at suave badinage, coaxing espionage, and persiflage questing rummage for junk in the trunk found me captivated by a woman nicknamed Msgeegee.
“So, you like Shakespeare also?” and then “Aside from that my potential linkedin lass, how did you like the play?” I blurted said gibberish when browsing at a major bookstore warehouse aware of this expensively attired African American middle age aesthetic gal.
Thus began an initial innocuous foray fur whit evolved into extra-marital, foreplay, and genital hormonal intoxication, when happenstance found me in the mood to put the electric kook aid acid test a self imposed interpersonal outreach re: comfort zone asthma own self con ed did exposure therapy asper the above broached casual ka bashed query.
At first blush, no inkling of marital infidelity spurred this high in the figurative saddle to rein horse sense, yet within an instant a mutual non-verbal whoa zapped thru this frank and earnest chap.
My shaky little Willy spear felt a sudden surge taw wanna indulgently loose mine strong lil lance into her hello kitty.
Know matter the marital vows pledged fidelity, this husband to be faithful (til death doom he part), the natural pang per sexual intercourse raced throughout every square inch of my five foot and ten inch average physique.
As seconds ticked away with both of us immediately inferring the lascivious, promiscuous, and tremendous undulation zinging betwixt us, any impropriety trampled amidst the clambering desire under the elms friskiness high jacking any original intent to visit book land.
Prurient onslaught nudged masterful linkedin kickass jettisoning indiscretion.
Heavy gonads fueled emancipation declaration communicating basic animalistic zeal tug gobble and drink up every square inch of her adorable, desirable, and gutsy jabbering (meaningless palaver) sans tryst vis a vis usurping our naked bodies latent heterosexual hankering like one cannon fired up red bull, where each sectioned chocolate flava flav flesh suctioned, a brew till lee ale ling delicious toddy.
Yepper by jeeve, this bone a fide gabbling, hectoring insidiously juiced kabob longed most narcissistically pet quadrant redolent sans tomahawk unsheathed vanquishing whoopi.
Although screened blackness of her highness fully clothed in white, I envisioned voluptuous breasts spilling forth before my eyes, and zaftig physiognomy oozing pheromones viz yule lee splayed before me in her birthday suit.
Methinks no doubt, that a horny man cannot keep mouth shut tight (though the mind shot thru with erogenous fellatio gratification, when strolling across the boulevard of broken whet dreams.
This contrived virtual testosterone story ratatouille qua poetic ova natural masturbatory license kindled jungle lingua harkening glibness forging ecstatic doggone copulation brood conflict.
Nonetheless, within an instant, we communicated volumes (and consummated fornicating tomes), which via click of our respective heals beheld us aware bedlam coaxed dreamscape event.
Fantasy galvanized hove imaginary lust miraculously, nimbly, and opportunistically prospective sexual fantasy materialized into a nonpareil indulgence of verboten fruit, whence mutual exuberance witnessed us as two veritable strangers just moments ago restraining every effort shrek out with excitement and dance.
Though this glorious gal claimed she never met anyone like me or the way I quickly segue weighed into prosaic predilection praising pitter patter, MsGeegee expressed unconditional acceptance, elation, and instant karma, that both of us assented to be symbionic.
Despite thy newfound land (albeit bronzed classy dame), she earned her keep working for the Internal Revenue Service graveyard shift, this ebony goddess promised to reconnoiter after she returned to her chic digs at approximately twelve fifteen in the morning admission, capitulation, das expostulation of yours truly able, eager, ready and willing to induce orgasm tipped the scales, and lit a metaphorical fire within libido of this mother of all Nubian Princesses.
Spake this hot to trot out ma lil pony did stirrup the premature ejaculation “Madam I’m Adam with Eve” re: cell oscillating, pulsating and quaking akin to Handle finding his messiah.
Stealth bomber tactics triggered cogs and wheels o’ me noggin to draft a reconnaissance near impossible mission navigating Onstar rammy stiff twig emboldened this scuttle butt if could do the wild thang.
Without missing a beat, she exuded je nais Sais quois esprit de corps at an instantaneous lickity split instant.
Coital consummation could barely be tamped down! Ooh, and aah, this street wise broad crackled, popped and snapped with damn the torpedoes immediate joust kinetically lending moist tender vittles, whose quickened pulse oven hot.
Fiery elements approximated Dante’s inferno.
I craved, fancied, and itched to needle the luscious swarthy two lips to buck cum tie dyed with my average size erect .
Preliminary warm up measures entailed plying these slender and smallish fingers (like a baker kneading dough) at juncture of her neck and shoulders.
As many cumulative kinks would be ironed out. Strong hands massaged muscles and tendons on either side of the spine (from stem to stern) privy to tender loving care. Special emphasis would be given to any particularly sore area. Perhaps an especially noticeable ache existed along the upper or lower back? Just the appropriate amount of (gentle) pressure - from heal of one hand or the other - called into action. Might forearms or biceps be in sore need of massage? Gluteus Maximus saddle sore? How about thighs? Any other parts of her anatomy received requisite skin nourishment. This willingness to manipulate knotty points of tension offered access to excellent passionate physical intercourse.
Game? Of course she surrendered into an extra-marital affair without hesitation despite a prior comment that she avoided getting into contentious dalliances with married men.
The loose woosel so black of hue fostered the same rose by any other name.... much ado about nothing – initiated this game of thrones.
Foursquare suburban credit availed tomb hie smallish slit eyed bore ring shaft plus smallish helmet head divining the verdant tree, where prick slid and slipped asper on a well lubricated sled, and regaled phallic experience negotiating slippery tread when genital purred.
Thus thy male member plunged into a coalition with plump well-tanned labia.
I surrendered to the pleasurable experience attained via as we master bated the other per climax to procure seminal moment, which would ensure to be the first of many a date whereby my erect ejaculated evoking erotic orgasm seething with hormonal secretion, that would melt antarctic glaciers.
The sentence of unfair celibacy and penile servitude loosed akin to a whale spouting - when observers shout, "thar she blows"!
The Idler Wheel Is Wiser Than the Driver of the Screw and Whipping Cords Will Serve You More Than Ropes Will Ever Do.
My whole foods being quivered like a taut arrow in bowstring primed to be released.
Animalistic, banal, carnal, diurnal, eternal, feral kindling passion brought to fruition heightening joie de vivre lovemaking whereby our carnal appetite swiftly tailored and hurriedly styled us into a private powerful vortex roiling the earth, with a hot wind and Saint Elmo's fire cascading like a massive sly rolling stone and Styx.
Gentle movements along either side of the upper thighs made contact with wooly Brillo pad lining inside warm, wet whirl a gig world web of wiry pubic hair. A plus if not reveal unshorn mossy condom free coat.
I carefully rubbed the outer labia to help learn contours of this foreign territory and also to spur lubrication and subsequent stimulation. Once adequately familiar with this personal furry fortress, the fingers plunged deeper into miniature caverns housing goblets of fire where this sexually healthy human hoped to be ushered into the secrete of chamber welcoming dandy a doodle ling.
First horizontally and then vertically these dexterous appendages create elliptical orbits over hill under dale in hot pursuit of one or more erogenous zone. All the while (or even some minutes prior), my sad yet cautiously optimistic looking smallish formerly flaccid weinerschnitzel became ramrod hard as a rock and engorged with seminal fluid. The penultimate capstone of said warm schmuck vasocongested well taut soldier of fortune, scouted out a place (around saturated silken road panties) to penetrate forth via this rather diminutive prick.
Back and forth trouser snake i.e. undersized blunderbuss of a male member parried and thrusted (with deep penetrating motions) to create orgasm before launching hormonal secretion into hot fiery cauldron, and ignited climactic erotic wind breaker while becoming erotically aroused.
Primal urges vis a vis atavistic, ballistic, cataclysmic, climactic, dogmatic, elliptic, metallic, narcissistic and orgiastic pulsations quaked the stock market, and shook the cosmic kashah with a wall street windfall.
Upon Plunging rock hard derrick into the greased dark abyss igniting inside with exhilaration and lightening bolts of eroticism.
