Lovely enchantress of cyberspace       Betwixt and between us 
lies an immense untraversable realm 
of never knowable forbidding possibilities 
quixotic, rhapsodic, sympathetic, telepathic..., 
where tantalizing, scandalizing, and revolting, 
nevertheless promising fantasies beckons 
buzzfeeding, crowdsourcing, dovetailing, 
earthshaking, foo fighting, hashtagging, 
jump/kick starting, twittering 
uber whatsapp pining 
 
toward pinteresting paroxysms 
of mental, physical, and spiritual ecstasy 
courtesy hotmail testosterone teasing temptation, 
thus methinks of the infinitely jesting 
combinations and permutations, 
where we could frolic in the autumn mist 
in a land called Honah Lee 
far from the madding crowd 
starkly aware of naked (lunch) able truth, 
the one predominant potential 
 
to become linkedin narcissistically - 
betokens prematurely ...  | 
  
  
  
       
      Temporal incarnation of Aphrodite...       induces idyllic reverie 
delight evoking similar surge, 
when skirting, and eluding 
fidelity defining the marital law 
on par with courting in flagrante delicto. 
  
After reading about 
Greek goddess of love 
fancy notion woke whereof 
warmth suffused me 
snug as fingers fitted into glove 
subsequent laissez faire attitude 
welcomed salvation, overstimulation, 
labialization, impenetration, 
fornication, and consummation from above. 
 
Hands folded prayer 
like to beseech thee 
to abduct me with 
no cause to up braid 
natural temptation found 
feral, gonadal, and hormonal paroxysm 
commanding, fueling, inducing longing 
from divinely devoted dada 
sacred marital covenant 
he twice blithely disobeyed 
willingly surrendering quintessential 
orgasmic manifestation to nymph. 
  ... | 
  
  
  
       
      Harold the Hugh Hefner wannabe carrot top...       spry buck analogous to energizing bunny 
jump/kickstarted procreation ruckus. 
  
Home on the range 
cacophony quite absurd 
PlayBoy Bunny herd 
and felt ingratiatingly inured, 
nevertheless colony or nest 
of doe eyed demoiselles 
stewed over their 
kit and caboodle being cannibalized 
gourmet chef “coney” or “lapin” 
delicacy the magic word. 
  
Ruled his hare'm 
nsync with trumpeting Donald Duck, 
(loud enough to arouse Daisy), 
the former cartoon character, 
a pensive searing black kind Roebuck 
hare to a fortune hauling trash and rubbish, 
 
whereby dust bunnies repurposed 
into environmentally friendly 
electric kool aid acid tested batteries 
powering many an electric truck, 
which wolfed, kick/jump started 
and guzzled down 
synthesized reconstituted quality kos...  | 
  
  
  
       
      Galley slave to obsessive compulsive disordered behavior announces...       Fore score minus xv orbitz ago 
from being centenarian 
strong contractions forced me 
to pass thru cervix, 
buck naked bare lady, 
I ranked as only grandson sharing 
same surname as Aaron, 
(mine paternal grandfather) 
me the sole heir – 
foreshortened to Sol Aire 
  
evinced scrawniness then (as shown 
via ultrasound), which at birth 
became crystal clear, 
unbeknownst to parents 
obsessive hidden compulsive predilection 
pronounced with social anxiety affliction 
manifested later in life, 
whose mental health of mine, 
would find me at sea 
schooled in counting fish, 
  
where I did flounder with anguish, 
nevertheless as newborn human being, 
the propensity with panic attacks 
a decade plus years in future 
whereat yours truly 
would ...  | 
  
  
  
       
      Isis staind 27+ years...       of scorpion stinging poison us marriage, 
whereby the missus and I, 
nevertheless experienced genesis as 
mama and papa respectively. 
 
(jest kibitizing) 
  
thus explaining why I 
(a beatle browed 
sixty five year young adult) 
joined blue oyster cult 
to live out my dream as 
a Norwegian bachelor farmer 
yours truly doth exult. 
 
Without wearing a helm mitt on my head, 
yet did suffer inxs 
of welts the size of cranberries 
amidst talking heads, whose traffic 
mishap of cars unable to stp, 
thus this passenger indistinguishable from 
avast metallica skidrow populated 
with heart shaped pearl jam wreckage 
upon smashing pumpkins everywhere 
with an evanescence shimmering 
like spilt midnight oil, which dire straits 
  
charged the super tramp ping 
man-made debacle into kiss 
... | 
  
  
  
       
      Argh, I ne'er got muffin top before - why now!?       Once upon a time yours truly did allow 
himself to consume anything in sight 
eats of mine in the mein 
included an assortment of chow. 
  
Impossible firm me 
(read my bookish self 
a schlepping schlemiel, 
with schmaltz and chutzpah 
stationed at Highland Manor 
in Schwenksville, Pennsylvania) 
to compete with Adonis, 
no way no chance 
asthma gut busts over 
waistband of sweatpants, 
the choice couture, 
 
asper this poet, who kant's 
cease spewing regularly 
(quotidian) raves and rants 
years ago (another lifetime), 
I partook of contra dance 
(the most fun one can experience 
while being clothed) 
sing, (and most casual suitable 
place to find romance) 
plus burn calories matter of fact, 
a milieu to buff and enhance 
 
physique, while simultaneously 
kibitizing with gre...
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      Heterosexual married sexagenarian male...       Aims to trigger cerebral orgasm; 
  
Other terms for said phenomena are 
"brain tingles" and "head orgasm." 
This sensation is described as a pleasant, 
even euphoric, tingling warmth and/or feeling 
of relaxation that comes in waves across 
the head, neck, and spine. 
This phenomenon is often triggered 
by soothing auditory 
and/or visual experiences. 
 
Though puzzled regarding 
the minor biochemical 
or perhaps neurological mystery 
underlying tumbling, plummeting, 
and nosediving libido of mine, 
nevertheless, I blessedly accept reality, 
whereby once raging testosterone 
figuratively analogous to former gushing spigot 
of hormonal secretion 
now (yes pun intended) runs bone dry 
and (contrary to any fallacy), 
NOT sorely missed! 
 
Yours truly (me) surmises absent sex drive 
linkedin to side effe...
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      While attempting going to sleep. after midnight..       December 27th, 2023, 
the missus pounded mine posterior 
(she played paddywhack 
on me blimey buttucks) 
not only causing contusion, 
but flaying percussive rumpus, 
where the wild things are 
found yours truly feeling 
like a cross between a bongo drum 
and a Ubangi 
(also spelled Ubangui, Ubanghi, or Oubangui). 
  
Meanwhile good n plenty 
good vibrations 
(cue the Beach Boys) resonated 
felt and heard round the world wide web 
(strongest quaking sensations 
occurred upon double mattresses atop bed 
within apartment unit b44 
2 Highland Manor Drive), 
  
but woody d'ya believe 
drumming, flagellating 
and whipping gluteus maximus 
spurred surging aftershock tremors 
launched rocketed pecker 
(property yours truly). 
  
Imagine slap happy spouse 
ain't mis...  | 
  
  
  
       
      Off kilter       Yup 
I sobered up 
despite expressing regular 
(unleaded and unlettered) 
urge to shtup 
expunged courtesy 
system of a down. 
  
The following crafted some time ago, 
when empty nest syndrome 
pulled me psyche taut 
analogous to an outstretched bow 
yet the shadow of mine eldest 
of two adult charming progeny, 
would be aghast and crow 
against her papa posting erotica 
elucidating, jumpstarting, parading 
adventures of his sorry excuse for  
cuz he (yours truly) 
nearly wrecked marriage 
  
cavorting, gallivanting, lapping 
residual womanly exudations 
analogous to volcanic Earthflow 
witnessing (at mere auto suggestion 
of Barenaked ladies bliss, 
albeit short lived), 
how agnst riddled Peppy (mine) 
did bulge, expand and grow 
a measly wienerschnitzel 
inducing Jolly Green Giant...  | 
  
  
  
       
      Stricken with turbulence at about sixty two inches       Yours truly issuing a deafening rebel yell 
bursting forth with such might 
courtesy cooking under pressure 
analogous to volcanic upswell, 
forcing me quickly to flap vestigial wings 
(at the speed of sound) 
while simultaneously karaoking William Tell 
 
overture apple lied courtesy top of the line 
supra-aural ('over the ear') headphones 
since altruistic anonymous 
philanthropist gifted me 
I bought the most expensive, 
which enveloped me 
analogous to pumpkin shell 
 
essentially vacuum or void created 
hands free contraption 
settled, and kick/jump started, 
and bathed noggin 
silencing external cacophony, 
whereby virtual realm didst quell 
chaos assaulting, bombarding, 
 
and enfilading sixty 
plus shades of gray matter 
like bats out of hell 
swarming infidel locked alone in his cell, 
who...
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