How do I Feel???

The Summer of

The summer of 

Alex Isley’s scattered tunes 

and melodies. Beats as we beat 

hearts and fast feet, linking up in

likewise thoughts and dreams.

The summer of loves heat, 

you wrote to make my soul speak, 

to make my flesh need, to entice my mind 

with fantasies. Scattered tunes

disguised as soaked sheets,

thumping rhythm covered

up as lyrical repeats. 

Ending seemed not as sweet, 

leaving loves regrets 

like yesterday’s beats,

melodies still lingering 

Snippets of Life

Begging and Pleading, trying and believing, 

knowning that this is not what

God  would have me completing,

laying up on deaths table

legs open and bleeding.

Wishing I was dying instead of breathing,

crying and heaving

still praying and looking for healing,

to this day i cant tell you one good reason. 

Snippet

How do I Feel???

How do I feel, like do you really want to know or are you just asking hoping your words will cover what your feelings show. 

How do I feel, like are you really ready for this long talk cause today was hard but if you wont hear me finish I won’t even start. 

How do I feel, like will you really listen or put your earphones on, dropping cubes on your phone while your eyes glisten. 

How do I feel, you ask but can you really stand the answer because these days judging by your actions does this “thing”even matter. 

How do I feel, you form these words into questions but it’s your form that I am beginning to question, cause your thoughts toward me don’t match your actions. Where am i going?

How am I feeling? Oh so I guess now you really want to know. When you see me walking with my bags towards the front door. Guess you know now I am no...

Empty...a snippett

You toyed with my dignity

But you didn't want what me

You wanted what was in me. 

Let's check this reality, no really

I had plenty, but you used me...

Now I'm empty. 

Will you stay??? pt 2

See because all i ever wanted was to be wanted. To be seen the way your eyes used to, to be groped in places unimaginable, but desirable. To be thought about as your one and only, I wanted you to want me. 

But alas you have chosen differently, you awoke with a changed mentality that for you I was not plenty or really any. 

You stayed just to satisfy me and to pacify your mind as you caressed my behind but lied to my mind, you disgust me. 

Your time here is through, really I should have had enough of you, yesterday came and my head was full, now as I walk you to the door your mouth is empty.

You spit out all of your excuses and you have found me useless.

Well he, he will find me a treasure by a standard that even you cannot measure, dont stop and try because for you its too late, but on the other side he stands waiting for me to be wanted. 

By Rhymechile

 for Eeeshland Vibes

Will you stay??? pt 1

It doesnt even matter now, honestly it never did. You are gone now really you were gone then, only your shell remained. I should have paid attention to the signs in the back of my mind. Yelling daily to my heart that says part of his love has stopped. Who was i kidding, trying to pull the wool over these eyes has made me blind. No touch, no talk, no initiation only reciprocation. When did you stop wanting me? When did the sight of me sexually do nothing for you visually. You used to find me stimulating now only irritating, really its hurting and frustrating, my eyes keep crying. Cold spaces in between our bodies in the bed, searching for a place to lay my head. And to lay. All i want you to do is want me like you did, touch me like you used to do. Love me like you said you would. Sex me like you fantasized...no make love to me. Hold me tight as we ride with love through the night and see the sun rise...will we survive? Will you stay?  pt 1

Really Free

There are times when i allow you to cross my mind...what was i thinking? This is not good for me or you...need to stop this. I am freer with you than without how do I utter this? 

You give me the fix. You float onto my psyche and cause me to drift...I cant get enough of this. Life is a trip literally and you are falling...take me. How far do you think we will go before your cover is blown? Your imperfections are shown. You always make promises that you cant keep, say things you dont mean. How long do you intend to hold me hostage , keep me on this leash? Treat me like a prisoner and come to me only to be released. Your passion is spread out across your lips and teeth, down your glistening skin and drips onto your feet. Am I your only dream? only to wake up and be released? No more OK this is enough for me, all done here nothing more to see. Just want to be really free. No more leashes on me, no more chains on my feet...just want to be really free. No more...

Longing

Looking back at the times of yesterday and knowing that there is no return but, still longing for that good oh so good when life and love felt like it should.

Dancing back to the oldies and the old ones told me what I should do,  but I couldnt hear them...the music was too loud. Cant hear you.              

Grooving to the beats that ring high in my ear, they shut out the fear that  screams within me, so still I stay tuned on. 

Feeling for the passion that once enveloped and seemed to control me, but it has let go...I fear it has left me. 

Loving the looks of those who admired me, loved me and ate me with thier eyes, heard the lust in thier voices but I silenced the cries. 

Walked into my destiny with this manFox ringing me, his thoughts my passions and my wants he inspires...this is fire. 

Sex, vision, thoughts, creation and desire,

arrival,...

Free

You Say

You say you love me but your fingers are steady pressing the like button on her/his Facebook page. Numb yet?

You say we are good and were together babe but your actions are telling me that it's someone else's touch and conversation you crave.

You say don't look for something that isn't there but I swear it's lies and deceit in those corners that you creep that have me scared.

You say that nothing ever happened or nothing is going on but it's the secret calls and back to back to back texts that are proving your words wrong. 

You see it's your actions that are proving your words to be a lie, so when do not trust you or I ask why, don't ask me why but know that your actions always speak louder than words and your actions will always be heard. Louder than words...

What did You Say?