How To Live Life
The person that confuses perfection with peace of mind,
Will have to realize that tomorrow they probably will still not find.
Whatever that they might have had in mind
about a future of any kind,
But maybe you only dream about such a thing
When you can no longer see because you are now -
Blindly following all of the people
who seem to so often be inclined
To dig their own grave
but still never leave anything behind.
But the idea that some judgement
has any kind of right to truly define
Any value in relation to human kind
While we fail to realize that
our own twisted inner-guide
Is the sole thing that binds us
to so called ‘solitary-confinement.’
That of which forces a focus
on simply just trying to survive
To be the only objective
that we can ever really strive for in this life
Instead of simply thriving
just on being alive.
Personally, the purpose of my life
is definately not to live it
... |
Lost
Lost in Time
Lost in the past,
Lost without Love
And lost without cash.
I'm a lot like a puppy
Just running the streets,
Lost without a family
And I'm lost in defeat.
Lost in a world
That scars me to death,
Lost in thought
And I'm losing my breath.
Lost without a heart
Lost without a soul,
Lost with so many memories
And I'm always left out in the cold.
Lost without very many true friends
And lost within my dreams,
Lost with the demons
I'm lost forever is how it seems.
I was lost as a child
And now I'm lost as an adult,
Lost in the darkness
and it must be all my fault.
Lost beneath the light
And I just cannot break free,
Lost from myself
There's just no longer any me.
I'm lost in words
Whether spoken or not,
Lost is the word
And that's all that I've got.
Lost and hurt
And lost in sorrow,
Lost today
And I'll probably be lost tomorrow.
Lost in pain
And lost in fear,
I'm lost in the rain
And I've lost so many years.
© Cry... |
Fakefriends
You call me a friend
As you pull out your knife,
You stab me in the back
Not once.... But twice.
"Friends for life" is what you said
But that was a straight up lie,
Cuz yourdoesn't have a clue
What it means to 'ride or die'.
I'm surrounded by nothing but wolves
That are all dressed up like sheeps,
All telling both faced lies
Damn near snitching on me.
Claiming that it was not you
Behind the lineup grass,
You shake pointed out my people
Just the save your own pathetic ass.
I would much rather sweat bullets
Then to search out for peace,
They're spilling out gallons of blood
Just to try to fight demons within me.
The battle continues
While frightening the anger within,
Because it's a full-time job
Dealing with fakefriends.
Every time that I think I know
What it is that they might do next,
You end up selling my homies out
For just a yard or less.
I hope that you at least made a dollar
As I'm screaming once again,
Cuz you're a straight-up punk
... |
Unstable Balance
Thoughts swirling-
Crashing like waves
against the shore.
Fears protruding-
Exploding like a volcano
up into the air.
Reality distorting-
Clouding like fog
covers field.
Heart longing-
Begging like a homeless man often has to beg for a meal.
Body shivering-
Freezing down through
my bones to my soul.
Head spinning-
Twirling like a horse
on a never ending carousel.
Soul wondering-
Simply just pondering
like a proven genius.
Moral shaken-
Jumping like a boy who has been
exposed to his own weakness.
Faith leaving-
Packing up and relocating
to somewhere else stable.
Eyes tearing-
Like a child cries under
the kitchen table.
Balance fading-
Falling like a river-bound
kind of suicide.
Future wobbling-
Realizing how truly lost
that I truly am inside.
© Crystal Floyd
May 19th, 2021 |
Below of the Beneath
Below Of The Beneath
I'm a lost thinker,
it gets me hook line and sinker
and oh well I forgot
to hit my blinker,
if I get stopped
I'll probably get thrown
Right into the clinker
But one thing is for sure
the right path is narrow
and you can own it
lock stock and barrel,
cleanse off the filth
and just become sterile.
Behind my eyes can you see
the basket case,
the misplaced
displaced
casket waste,
the face
of disgrace,
perfectly put back
into my place.
Six years ago today
I joined the deep underground,
looking for sight or sound
But no where to be found,
bound like the frown
on a clown
I might be too tightly wound
But I am about to come un-wound so here I am
just jotting some thoughts down,
But I can't be contained,
While I'm outside of insane
And inside of my own brain
I cannot say it anymore plain
As I see transparent windowpanes,
created by flames
in the heat of July,
So I will quietly sigh,
as I type
Thi... |
Just Exist
So many people walk the earth. With purpose in their eyes, But in their hearts they know That what they are living is a lie,
The alarm goes off 6am, . Like every other day, . So they can walk into a job they hate, . Beca... |
My Own Memory Library.
Imagine if I was given just one moment
just a single slice of my past,
I would hold it close forever
so that moment would always last.
I'd
I would put that moment into a safe
within my hearts' abode,
And I could open it up anytime that I wanted
and only I would know the code.
I would choose a time of laughing
a time of happiness and fun,
I would choose a time that tested me
through every single thing I have done.
I sat and I thought about which moment
Would possibly almost always make me smile,
Which moment that would always
Push me to walk that extra mile.
If I am feeling sad and low
Or if I am struggling with what I should or should not do,
I can go and open my little safe
and watch my moment through.
There are some moments that I can think of
that would be able to lift my spirits each and every time,
The moments when you picked me up,
when the road was hard to climb.
For me to only pick one moment
To cherish, to save and to also keep
is pr... |
I still matter
My looks are nothing special,
My face reveals my age,
My body shows some wear and tear,
And my energy's not the same.
Too often my memory fails me,
And I lose things all the time.
One minute I know what I plan to do,
And the next it may just slip my mind.
I try hard to avoid my mirror.
There are things I would rather not see,
And even those times when I just catch a glimpse,
I can no longer recognize me.
The things I used to do with ease
Can now cause aches and pains,
And the quality of the things I do
Will never be quite the same.
I always compare my older self
To those younger versions of me,
And I know I'm wasting too much time
Missing who I used to be.
But the thing that really makes me sad
Is despite what people see,
Underneath my tattered, worn out shell,
I'm still the same old me.
My heart can still feel endless love,
And at times it still can ache.
My heart can fill with so much joy,
And then it... |
Life... Happens
The thing about pain
Is that it will npt ladt forever,
And though it might be killing you right now
Know that with time it does really get better.
The thing about scars
Is that they will all eventually fade,
Until thete is nothing left at all
Then of the cuts that were once made.
The thing about today
Is that is always tomorrow,
And if you are unable to fi d ypir own smile
Then I have one that you can borrow.
The thing about help
Is beside you it stands,
But it will not know that it us even needed
Unless you reacg out your hand.
The thing about love
Is that you cannot ferl its touch,
Until ypu let another person know
That for you this world is just too much. |
A conversation with a strange woman
The once spoke with a woman
with an illness inside of her heart,
I was there to simply ask her a few questions
But I just did not quite know how to start.
How do you ask a person
who can count their time that they have left,
Which moments that they regret in life
and whuch ones that they liked the best.
I did not quite know how to ask her
If she could give me any kind of advice,
When I was given my entire life to live
And she had only gotten a slice.
I was scared that she might judge me
For wasting minutes of her time,
So I asked her just one question
As I heard her old clock chime.
I asked her what it felt like
Knowing that soon that she would die,
And as she told me her short answer
She looked me straight into the eye.
"I might know that my time is ending
But pity for you is all that I have got,
Because since I wake up knowing that I am dying
You wake up pretending that you are not."
Crystal K. Floyd
February... |
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