I am at war with myself, struggling with my multiple personalities. Is it fantasy or reality? These are the entities that I'm battling, good and evil. Both necessary for the other but killing off one claims two casualties. Speaking on life while I preach about death is an everyday duality. A sinners rage on center stage is menstrual so through this pen I bleed. Painting pictures of my life story. So in tune with the audience of my artistry but it's hard to see the abstract in glory so to get a clearer view I figured you could just live this life for me. I am awkwardly woven and well spoken, a contradiction. Like the born, standin out, dying to fit in. But, inside. The alone is unknown so how can my pain be felt. I am a collection of collected flaws. Sacrificed so much of me to be everything for all...selflessness negated through selfishness, used and discarded as if I were disposable. So enamel with inspiring others to finish the race I never even started. I was forever promised from seasonal people, feeble. And I believed em. I became cold hearted and guarded. Disregarded my own garden that I had planted seeds for life in but I found no substance from my own harvest. Spiritually starving. Divine peace preached through a hostile mind and I had questioned who God is because even the found sheep fell victim to the wandering wolf. So what's it worth to go through hell just to get to church. Anointed with responsibility of voice but facts followed.. Who is really listening. I'm at war with myself, still unsure of which side is winning. I just know that I'll come out better then I ever was in the beginning.
AngieThePoet
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My war within
CATEGORY
life
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COMMENTS
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mlowe5 says: Angie The Poet, thanks for sharing this profound write. So much metaphoric imaging flowing with pain and uncertainity rhythmically streaming. I felt the pain and heard the cry. You are a beautiful soul who can only be who and whose you are. The enemy is fear! Love yourself---there is no fear in love---partricularly self love. From the beginning, you were destine to be who and whose you are. As you continue to climb the winding staircase of life, know that you are on the side that's winning---that pregnant poetic side out of which this profound and powerful pen was born. Write on as you climb and grow. Peace and Lowe, mlowe5. |
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Angiethepoet says: Thank you so much...I appreciate the feedback as it comes...as I move forward...I'll keep your words in mind |
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Angiethepoet says: Thank you so much...I appreciate the feedback as it comes...as I move forward...I'll keep your words in mind |
OTHER POEMS WRITTEN BY AngieThePoet
HAPPILY EVER AFTERI WAS LOST BUT WHEN I FOUND YOU I FOUND PATIENCE. WITH NO TOOLS, WHO KNEW WE WOULD BUILD A FOUNDATION. I SEE YOU GIVING ME YOUR ALL, NOT JUST A DOWN PAYMENT. I THREW IT IN MY EX'S FACE LIKE IT WAS FOUNDATION. YOU NEVER HAD TO ASK "WHY" YOU ALWAYS LET IT SLIDE AFTER ASKING LANDED YOU INTO SOME FOUL PLACES. YOU DONT KNOW IT BUT PURPOSE IS WHAT YOU GIVE MY LIFE. I WAS COMFORTABLE BEING HURT, I THOUGHT THAT WAS RIGHT . WHEN THEY SAID LOVE DONY COST A THING. WELL, I GUESS I PAID A DIFFERENT PRICE, TIL YOU OPENED UP MY MIND. YOU TAUGHT ME A LOT OF THINGS, LIKE HOW I EVEN KNOW IM GROWING BECAUSE ITS ALWAYS ROOM TO GROW. DEEP CONVERSATIONS JUST TO PENETRATE MY SOUL. YOU REALLY HAVE THIS HOLD ON ME, I CANT SEEM TO LET YOU GO. I WONT PLAY WITH THIS FIRE BECAUSE I KNOW I CAN BE BURNED FROM IT. MY EX'S WAS ALL ON BULL AND YOU TAUGHT ME HOW I CAN LEARN FROM IT. WHEN I SPEAK ON YOUR NAME I LOSE MY WORDS FROM IT. THATS PROBABLY WHY I GOT TO WRITE IT DOWN. AS MUCH EXPERIENCE AS I DONT GOT, WHA...  |
My war withinI am at war with myself, struggling with my multiple personalities. Is it fantasy or reality? These are the entities that I'm battling, good and evil. Both necessary for the other but killing off one claims two casualties. Speaking on life while I preach about death is an everyday duality. A sinners rage on center stage is menstrual so through this pen I bleed. Painting pictures of my life story. So in tune with the audience of my artistry but it's hard to see the abstract in glory so to get a clearer view I figured you could just live this life for me. I am awkwardly woven and well spoken, a contradiction. Like the born, standin out, dying to fit in. But, inside. The alone is unknown so how can my pain be felt. I am a collection of collected flaws. Sacrificed so much of me to be everything for all...selflessness negated through selfishness, used and discarded as if I were disposable. So enamel with inspiring others to finish the race I never even started. I was forever promised ... |
my sisters protector (poem for bruce&robin}why does it take death to tell the tale of lifes meaning, i only smile because i know you would but truly underneath is a man screaming. lost in my feelings and everytime i inhale it feels like im in hell and i see fewer reasons to wanna continue breathing. wide awake, living a nightmare, at war with these flames but death doesnt fight fair so i sleep as much as possible because in my dreams i know that you will be right there. some days i wish i never knew you so i wouldnt have to go through the agony of having to lose you. the world could never comprehend my guilt knowing i couldnt come to your rescue, the helplessness i feel realizing my prayers wont ressurect you, the rage thats inside of me knowing i couldnt protect you is only subsided by the comfort in knowing god will accept you. My todays mean nothin, yesterdays have stolen the ability for me to see a better tomorrow. i didnt know it until it happened but this was my biggest fears, cryin out for what seems like years hop... |
Break up letter pt2Here we go again... Same story but a different chapter but these pages lead to the conclusion. I never promised to be perfect but I promise you I was worth it and if my purpose was to make you a better man for another woman then I jus hoped that you used it. Two hearts with one beat that sounded like music but now these lyrics are simply confusion. You were my end and beginning and I felt like I was winning but it turned out I was losing... I just wanted us together but how many storms can one person weather. Through all the rights and wrongs, disagreements over house and homes, dismissive tones, cause the words do cut deeper then sticks and stones. I never buckled under pressure and u know it's true, I sacrificed the indifference of the many for the commitment of the few. You weren't someone id cry over but you were strong enough to cry to. I know my love was a bit unusual but my stand for you was unmovable, my loyalty, irrefutable, your disrespect was inexcusable so I genuinely... |