(To the Rapper's Delight instrumental)
I said a Shem, Lot
A fish ate Jonah, for not doing what he ought
Moses hit a rock!
Years after he saved his people, and fled Egypt by parting the Red Sea!
Now what you heard, was all a test, written in antiquity!
And if you dig these rhymes, then find some time, to read your B-I-B-L-E!
(Isaiah)
The Kings of Judah were such a disgrace
In the race to save Jehovah, I got first place
Its the I – S – A – I – A and please don’t forget the H!
I’m the He-brew, who first knew, that Jesus was on the way (Say what?)
700 years before he was born, so please listen to what I say!
I testified, day and night, about God’s mercy and grace
I wrote all, about Satan’s fall, and how he lost his place
Finally, I scolded Israel for its sin, ignorance, and mistakes…
The next up is a good friend of mine, who also has an eponymous book
He spent some time in prison y’all, but-but-but folks he ain’t no crook!
(Jeremiah)
I’m Jeremiah, the weeping prophet, A.K.A Jehovah exalts
May I share with you, just a few, of my pitiful woes and faults?
When I was young, I didn’t speak
God said chin up kid, you’re so unique!
The message that you need to share, most won’t wanna hear (Say what?)
So just smash a pot, when folks get shocked, then they’ll lend an ear!
These are my ‘Lamentations,’ that’s a fancy word for grief
I was double crossed and thrown in jail, but-but folks I ain’t no thief!
They tossed me in a cistern*, but I didn’t drown because
In lieu of water, I was shocked, the whole place was full of mud!
An Ethiopian and 30 folks pulled me out, and told me not to fret
But-but we ain’t friends, ‘cuz just then, they put this yoke around my neck!
After I was finally free, I travelled way, way out west
And don’t you know, in Egypt y’all, they stoned your boy to death!!!
(Ezekiel)
Wow, man, that testimony was really depressing and dark!
Give it up for my Main Man Jeremiah, y’all, ‘cuz he had heart!
My name’s Ezekiel, that means God strengthens, in Hebrew
When God led me to the valley of bones, he knew what I would do!
God resurrected ‘dem bones and showed me an incredible vision
And told me that Israel was where we ‘posta be living!
For years, my people were exiled, way out in Tel Aviv (Say what?)
So I put my city on my back, and then rolled up my sleeves!
All good deeds, olive branches, and fig leaves?
No more false idols, lofty titles, do-overs, or reprieves!
We’ll be really good this time, Lord, I’ll get them all to believe!
(Daniel)
Its Daniel y’all, the last prophet, of this pious crew
Let me tell you all, what it was, that God would have me do!
Beyond reading the writing on the wall, and surviving in that lion’s den
With God’s power, I gave Darius back his sight again! (Say what?)
Even my friends, Abednego, Meshach, and Shadrach
Walked out of a burning fire, ‘cuz God had their back!
Just learn from all of our lessons, and be each other’s blessings
God’s got your back, whenever you get lost
No fee see? Because He, already paid the cost!
Pray every day, and use the Bible as your map
The Lord works in mysterious ways, Jack, ain’t that a fact!?
I said a Shem, Lot
A f fish ate Jonah, for not doing what he ought
Moses hit a rock!
Years after he saved his people, and fled Egypt by parting THE Red Sea!
Now what you heard, was all a test, written in antiquity
And if you dig these rhymes, then find some time, to read your B-I-B-L-E!