Reach to Me
Through a boy, our son, his own person
His lessons we learn from him & circle like Eagles in protection of his soul
Reach to me
Across the valant seas and windchimes of New Orleans
Reach to me
Leave the scar faded but in heart left from our absent fathers
Reach to me
His head so beautiful his voice so curious, expecting your warmth and embrace
A father tall with three proud kings
I came the last fallen maiden, the youngest to bear you one more son
With my maturity of heart it is me you whisper to
That loving the children comes easy
Yet you furrow your brow in despair at the gregarious task of appeasing me
Do not worry my children you say know love
Why am I the cleaner of home and holder of your pain when you wrap your arms around me your heart beats on another plain
I'll hoover away ... |
The Pleasing Maiden and Mother Crone
The maiden, the mother, the lover, the crone
Stages conjoiled as if the blood pattern does not change
History of satisfied belief of helping their view point relieves mine
Sit with the mother and ease worries offering lavendar bath and rock salts to ease
Uplift the breast that suckled, pleasured, tempted
Feel consumed by opinion
Into dust I lie thee down so adjacent doors can close
A wolf cries from interior stomach a wolf cries to the produce of her womb
Shes wild amongst trees and his fist had tried to tame
HIs comments on morning breeze first heard breath
She paints bright colours onto stone
As her hand, dainty becomes almighty
As her love calls her fathers name
This gentle touch will not be so soft
When it falls onto her assailant from intervention pure, real and natural
It becomes her healer, her secret keeper... |
Sweet Jesus
Sudden toil the rhythms of the routine,
The locked up stillness of not having something to plan to look forward to
A plan, a dream that always is dismantled to bring new lesson
Nothing is ever as we visualise, I laugh at the Law of Attraction
I snort at manifestation
Each seed brings forth an apple tree when I dreamt of strawberry bush
This is the real teachings not a shiny photo shopped image
As I am confined to office block and housing block and square box selling to me
I choke like invisible chain is surrounding my being
I tear inside at generational trauma of 400 years
Then I press stop. I walk amongst trees, sassy and living, feel the energy gloominess of night, reflection of sun, lunar year beginnng in March
I attend to my gut
Ancestors cover hands of blended skin over my womb area
And I sing
I ... |
La La Lonely
So mek we sit and consider numbers, age the reach of my hips
Let me review a liccle
La La Lonely - figuring into belief
Stove has on it some good greens, some spice and my fish will fry
Tasks complete and work is I guess neat
Still I'm up late again seeing my own wrists rubbing holding folding into my rib cage
It is thirteen years since I expected foriegn travel to end in a ring
It was suttin, plastic fake Rolex time clock ticking backwards
My time has run a mile, a marathon
So nowadays I don't want to get it wrong
Have the wisdom to know whats good and the fool in me wishing I would
Steam my face with bath water special flannel
And see me again
My bathroom picture says man and woman
I flick braids and sigh
Leaning into words cos the debt man took the TV
Still I'm build... |
Masks we wear
I am hidden
Masking my truth behind water I carry in emotion
Wells to my nephew
Womb child missing far away
Near to my spirit
In my beating youthful heart
Working close to the just be
Clothes that I wore, music I listened to
Pretending I didn’t see guns or hear earth on early come sun hidden dusk graves
Light of angel of the north
Flaps metal wings effortlessly
Over the small home where I carried child alone, walking 8 miles to fetch our nourishment
Danced and played Lions with the sofa turned on head
Sung him gently to sleep
Listened as he woke at 4am kicking humming talking wandering the streets of Newcastle in the ghetto of course
Looking for his father, Spirit child
I’m removed
In their eyes
I wish to tattoo my wrist with St Christopher Patron Saint of Travel, my sons namesake and Cool B... |
Distance
Far away, black bags lay riddled with your clothes
Brown boxes frame your entry into the future
And here where she used to stay by me hand in mine
She is happy with her life
The figuring out of my own accountability
I am not ashamed or afraid of the gangster time of my life
Did I throw signs and tattos against her restless sleep
Send sirens to the ear lobe?
Was there the disruption of my womb giving life to another
Whose father is street orientated
I sit without glasses poised, eyes not reading so brightly
Yet my soul jumps and I know I am forgiven for what was not mine
Just paralled parked for awhile
Then drove away
does this drive you away now? My sisters riding forth with righteousness
Leaving memories of laughter
All I can do is work for more but unapologetically
I did me.
|
Out of Lewisham Hospital
The doors closed behind me, I was released!
I exhaled for what felt like the first time in weeks and breathed in again deep
I felt fit compared to the otheres there - I was well, compared
I forgot my misty bath salts and razors so buzzed again
returning scared, scared they would take me in again like an envelope
Fold me up, lay me down on plastic sheets, inject my butt
The food was pasty, same coloured and dull. the heat drifting from the radiators was stagnant wasn't made of sunshine
Keys turn, doors lock, windows closed shut
In case we jump - I muse
Here in the now there is a way out, a way to begin again
At yet I am starting at nothing
Suddenly food became my hero
The pressing of darkness lifted in Morleys, Spagetti with bolognase, Amlya, Puff puff and fried rice
Why did I not think twice?
My centre ... |
Next Steps
The head rises in the morning,
Hope hits the brain the cortex pumping with dreams
Yesterdays nightmare
Blue black ink scrawling across the window pane, the rain
Dark hours and lifting to light
Needing the size of happenings to come to me
May I grasp the challenge with clenched fist
Embrace it all with a twist
Take doubt and shout out the anxiety
Reach up to be found in happy sobriety
Let me bond, let me lay my head with sisters, locked, flowing, afro or muse
Mother, carer and poets
Helping the start again
The begin again
The feeling of no shame
A water running through my womb
|
Rivers Nuh Part
Great rivers may nuh part to reveal the separating of water
Slight hand may not feed the masses from one piece of fish
Skies may not cry out the messiah
Still me feel shook
Mek me take to a comfort of blanket & reach round pon the vast playground of life, wonder who tek way we rights?
More than dat suttin not fittin' to sweet
I'ma hush hush and keep peace with my faith
Jesus is his name
Son of all things
Cos nutting don't go so from cough a splutter & cold
Suttin don't feek right
I'm just not sold on government to spent ah tek way from we
All dem taxes and no explanation for tragedy?
Suttin don't feel right
Suttin ain't sweet
|
Waiting For you - For my Son
You are to me my beginning the reason for me
To be a better version of me
You are to me my ceiling where I reach I find caution
You are to me a nightinggale song of heaven flung
You are to me black sugar and honey sweet
You are to me the sound of coins in purse and notes folded all for you and my legacy my future my grandchildrens father
Your blessed being travelled through me
Into this wider world
Your intrigue and sweet singing dancing foot
And growing body, mind and soul
Possessing with dominance this future world
You are to me affirmation of black excellence
A whirldwind in arms of your fathers chest
You are to me why each and every pain i endure
Ends up blessed
SON.
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