pain is ugly but necessary to properly heal one's aching soul day & night I prayed to God to take it away but knew all along what God would say endure is that a cure will long suffering make me strong I swear I'll do most anything to break free of the agony that plagues me I know it's a reason for all things still I can't wrap my mind around what that reason would be for what ills me hoping it does not kill me in the long run it's more emotional than physical if I start to dig no telling how deep it goes I can't get out the hole it has a hold on me I need to heal it takes time to heal I'm not stubborn there's some things I can't feel not even if I touch it with my hand it's hard to grasp some thoughts it's a puzzle with missing pieces and parts nowhere to start matters of heart I paint a forest and get lost in the artifact pass it round the room and hand it back it's too fragile for that