I can not answer
today
how it all would’ve turned out if we had stayed together at the time
I never had a crystal ball or
fortune cards to predict the future
and if offered one
would’ve politely refused
trusting in a more intelligent
stable
and mature source than I was at that time
I watched
as the tears fell from your face
and your voice didn’t have the alluring softness which seduced me
sustaining me through countless midnight rides on the New Jersey transit bus lines
it was the softness of genuine heartfelt pain
for any moments of anguish
and/or
leftover love you might’ve felt for me
thereafter
I only wished you peace and happiness
with someone who could give you all that I could not give
all that I did not possess at that time
and now, it is finished...
because I have often thought of you and loved what we used to be
yesterday
as you cried when I left you
my tears were hidden from your sight
it was my wish and prayer
years from that moment
today
I would be forgotten in your memory
and you would be content and at peace with life and love
as I am right now
because I have written this not only to you
and for you
but for myself
and now, it is finished