I ask myself am I calm cool and collected or am l pretending to be calm cool and collected when I was a child I was good at pretending that everything
okay, alright, fine good ect
that's when I started building walls to keep
stuff from getting to me
but the thing about a wall
is at some point of life you have to come out from behind it and face the world
I tend to play it safe by
staying away from those
who upset me like some
members of my family
who tend to really get
under my skin honestly I don't think l actually
stopped pretending because in my mind they
all die and I'm the one
who killed them off when
I look back at me as a
child I'm still pretending