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In a marriage, what is “for life?” or, until death do you part?
Or is it until one cheats, gets sick, loses their job, go to jail, get on drugs, become abusive…? Because if neither one of yall are dead and death did not part yall, then why are yall apart? Why are you divorced?
When you got married, you said, “I Do.” You do what?
You do wanna leave, you do want a divorce, you do want out, you do want to cheat, you do wanna have your cake and eat it too…?
You do wanna hit your wife, you do want to be abusive, you do want to be controlling?
You do wanna lie, you do want to be disrespectful, you do want to fuss and complain, you do want to gamble, you do wanna hang out all night…?
Or, is it that your “I Do” mean, you do want your family, you do want it to last, you do want to be faithful, you do want to be trustworthy, you do wanna communicate, you do want to build and grow together?
You do want to pray and prosper, you do wanna be loving, you do want to be supportive, you do want to grow spiritually, you do want your marriage to work, you do love your spouse…?
Why say I do and then don’t. If you say “I do,” well then do!
We all have choices in life, so if you are married, that’s because you chose to be married. My advice to you is to eliminate the things which may cause you to have to apologize for.
Yes, meaning, not doing things that will cause you to have to say, “I’m sorry.”
If you don’t want to be sorry for cheating, don’t cheat.
If you don’t want to have to say you are sorry for hitting your spouse, don’t hit them. If you don’t want to have to apologize for being disrespectful, then don’t be disrespectful.
Ask yourself, is being mad and not speaking to your husband for four hours worth it?
Is going to bed mad and you all the way on one side of the bed and your spouse on the other side and I don't want your feet to touch mine worth it?
Is you being jealous worth it?
Is you going out getting drunk worth it?
Is what we really arguing about worth it?
Why waste those four hours being mad, because one thing for sure, you not ever in life gon get those four hours back.
What if that was the last four hours you got to spend with your spouse and you spent it being mad. Ask yourself, is it worth it? Because eventually yall are going to make up, so why not do it sooner rather than later. Any disagreement, resolve it.
Any argument, fix it - And fix it NOW, not later.
Marriage requires forgiveness. God forgives us, who are you not to forgive? Do not let anger linger.
Pray and ask God to guard your tongue. Your words are Powerful and when used in a hurtful manner it can damage your relationship.
Be impeccable with your words, use your words to build each other up, not tear each other down.
You old stupid ass, how dumb can you be?
Go sit yo fat, goofy looking self down.
I hate you, get the hell out my face.
Does that sound nice hearing that from the one you love and who say they love you?
When you speak harsh, mean and hurtful words, whether at home, work or out in the world, stop and ask yourself, was what I just said pleasing in God’s sight?
Is God pleased with what I just said?
Is God pleased with what I just did?
Learn to aim to please God and do what is pleasing in God’s sight, not what is pleasing in man, woman or society’s sight.
Would I want God to speak to me like this?
Would I want God to do to me what I just did to this person?
So with that being said, you said “I Do,” so from now on, DO.
Do work towards eliminating your negative behavior and get back to being that loving, caring, sensitive, respectful, funny, ambitious person that your spouse married. You do your part and work on you and change in the areas that need changing.
If you did 10 things wrong today, the next day do 8, then 5 and then soon it would be down to none. Each day work on righting your wrongs and eventually you won’t have no wrongs to right.
And yes, there will be times you will slip up, but once you continue to catch those slip ups and fix it right then, you will begin to notice when there are no “slip ups,” because by now, you got this.
You won’t even have to ask God was this pleasing because you will immediately know, it wasn’t.
If you yell, curse or say something mean, you will catch yourself and say, “You know what Sweetheart, that didn’t come out right, let me rephrase that.” You will become your own auto correct.
You will immediately know to fix it right then and there, not four hours later. Learn to enjoy life, enjoy each other.
Now, after reading this, I Do.
I do believe in you.
I do see you want to change.
I do believe things will get better.
I do see the joy and laughter restored.
I do see longevity in your marriage.
I do believe God will be pleased with your growth.
I do know, You Got This!
I do see the broken pieces being mended.
Now be that positive change until death do yall part.
Be Blessed!
