I think that is what it feels like when you aspire to something and you dont quite make it there. You would look at the situation and wonder if you are a failure but still not taking the time to step back and looking at all that you have accomplished.
A definite pain in the a**
Dragging yourself through the world and not giving yourself enough credit for all of the little things you have accomplished. I compare it to rays of the sun, you can't avoid the things you have done. So keep pushing to achieve a little more.