No Inflated Cheekiness For This Logophile

No Inflated Cheekiness For This Logophile

I comport myself with quiet pridefulness,
plus intellectual whimsy

aware that "FAKE" pretentiousness,
could be mistaken foreign egotistical vitae
furthering, feathering and figuratively
undermining jestingly,

poetically, and zealously
oozing, gushing, bubbling over

with faux snobbish suave re:

pulse sieve literary fatuous
haughtiness, and ludicrous narcissistic pre

ning all the while chuckling to me

self, and indifferent if
some anonymous browser
with Dutchman's breeches rolled up
upon cresting wave over Zyder Zee

disparages mine harmless
badinage, hence if ye
might qualify as such nitpicker,
who doth cavil - dee

crying wading thru

quagmire of verbiage,
a gentle reply to thee

might be more wise to turn energy

toward, how in man...

Oy vey iz mir, one day in the life of a common house broken schmeckle...,

who did pötschke
and squander many an opportunity
to become a mensch
instead he became persona non grata
condemned to a history of misery,
not unlike Doctor Hyde and Mister Jekyll,
where friends, Romans countrymen did heckle.

After all said and done,
I best have stayed
safe and sound in the womb,
or hopefully at the least honored after death
with a squadron of B-52s
flying overhead with vroom
while being enshrined in a tomb,
cuz the living years of yours truly (me),
one after another trial and tribulation did loom
which figurative weave
courtesy weft and warp wove gloom
ordained I experienced hell on earth,
thus an inescapable doom
left no option except to skadaddle
into the outer limits of the twilight zone
at the edge of night
courtesy magic broom.

Plenty of times,
I ate in a crowded h...

She loves me she loves me not...

Just my luck that when juiced a lad
din grammar school, aye own every
rhyme and reason tubby mad

every friggin time boyhood fingers

plucked petals off flowered daisy...
 

just as well, a relief and more than glad
tomb hiss out on doing the wild thang

and be'n totally tube yule lore lee baad
yea, how boring squirreled away
voraciously reading 'bout some cad
 

oh my dog...I too could write story

"FAKE" steamy extramarital liaison add

chocolate flavored Glynnis (Msgeegee),

whereby celibate chap goes stir crazy - egad

yours truly drives back to her pad
 

within sketchy part of West Philadelphia

starring as chief protagonist
none other then... yupper this dad

until caught with pants down (figuratively)

thine missus both angry at me and sad
 

Bully me you, I exemplified archetypal scapegoat...

who suffered cuts by a thousand knives.

Even as old (dish) married
(spooning) curmudgeon,
who receives social security disability
linkedin with social anxiety)
chose the fork less traveled
aye pucker with sunken cheeks,
(especially without dentures)
and raspily suction toothless mouth
drawing reminiscent guffaws affecting
attempt impersonating plumber

(think suctioning and unclogging toilet)

please support your local bummer

back in the day one
long haired pencil neck geeks palled
around with another
hirsute nerd - Roger Kummerer,
(who both of us graduated Methacton
High School class of 1977),

and yours truly readily

admitting, alluding, and attesting

without shadow of doubt

representing the dumber

than rocks of said beastie boys

bandits, donning partico...

Though forever sober, nevertheless numbskull of mine throbs

I (a lapsed milquetoast) experienced
a head splitting hellacious hangover.

I tried to be part of Cool And Gang by being "bad"

to the thoroughly good bone, er...
which trend followed me till man hood,

whereby this bloke still a cad

plus the most

embarrassing older hippy dad
where a shaved pierced pate egad

seems to be the latest fad

boot this nonestablishmentarian

feels more content with himself and glad

though as a precocious

whipper snapper of young lad

did act like "Curious George",

which found me late mum
and then octogenarian

widower father quite mad,

especially when breaking

into the liquor cabinet in me homey pad

and nearly escaped by a scad
dad dull when the hide o me buttocks

whacked more'n a tad.

 ...

Sophistication of sinister online skulduggery...

lurks within the outer limits of cyberspace,
where dark shadows eclipse edge of night
indistinguishable from the twilight zone.

Within the Internet binary size weavers loom
shuttle whizzes (analogous to a bad mitten)
at speed of greased lightning warp speed
weaving courtesy electronic webbed wide world
snaring and snagging
poor schlemiel or schlimazel,
videlicet snazzy convincing culprit,
who gets figuratively sucker punched
courtesy malevolent scoundrels
(devoid of moral scruples)
to mimic legitimacy
subsequently scam without misgivings
(but exude untrammeled glee)
preying upon vulnerable particular populations
such as the elderly and infirm.

Victim services of Harrisburg, Pennsylvania
helped me recoup one hundred Benjamins,
whereas gofundme page
(I jimmied up for myself)
wrought nary a handy dandy blues clues

Ice say... water we dew wing to planet Earth?

Tis appalling Homo sapiens legacy,
the future survival of species can ill afford
hence we must not dodge and dart away,

but heed urgent call to arms decree fiat,

lest vast gamut of flora and fauna

deprived their rightful respect
 

courtesy ewe buick wit us ram

me bipedal hominids wresting

driver's seat and steering fate
all species unfairly doomed
analogous to horse and buggy

only far worse, whereat naked ape

that nasty short tempered and brutish

beast finagled, hijacked, besotted,
usurped... sacred covenant taurus

once illustrious precious habitats
escorted to shreds

innocent plants and animals, we
 

signalled anonymous poetic mouthpiece,

cuz world wide webbed tapestry

irreparably tattered, thus swiftly tailored

measures beg critters to needle

arro...

Harriet Harris née Kuritsky...

Despite being a nineteen year old bride

she wed Boyce Brandon Harris
half a decade her senior,
(where I ranked less than a twinkle in their eyes)

during the month of June 1955,
not quite half a century later ~ May 4th, 2005
death severed the pledge she did troth
linkedin wifely role,
cuz against her will she died

at most four weeks to be more exact
golden wedding anniversary never witnessed
raging against accursed grim reaper
countenance succumbed into collective sorrow

life force forever absent snatched away,
yet magically transformed
into the breathing edenic idyll
courtesy green thumb of eldest sister of mine
once livingsocial mother of ours
invoking trademark contagious l'chaim
flickering aura, charisma, instant karma
persona could not hide mommy dearest
physically eclipsed after
rigor mortis displaye...

Eagerly awaiting until many tomorrows...

to become affianced to the grim reaper,
who never promised me a rose garden
nor crystal clear pool of fragrant delight
to accompany last living breath
before succumbing into the Soundgarden
of a black hole sun
re: the void of nothingness
with absolute zero remembrance of things past.

Suicidal ideation in tandem
with purposelessness
(nihilistic existentialism exponentially
increasing since my halflife ago),
and most importantly
cursed with flat limp hair,
which serious crisis undermines reason
to write reasonable poetic expression

spurs the notion to traverse consciousness,
and painlessly segway

into the hereafter
(and maybe reincarnated into a heifer)
on a broken wing and a prayer.

No glorious notion of heaven
(nor belief in some omnipotent supreme creator,
who will be instrumental
uniting ...

Suddenly frisson coldplay linkedin with fright...

I describe, suddenly feeling scared

and tried to summon sense and sensibility

after scrambling to stand upright

with all my might.

Otherwise titled

recalling taking a fall

about five years ago

ala Humpty Dumpty impersonation

(and nearly cracking me noggin),

think the character

in an English nursery rhyme

opened to countless interpretations,

even resorting to ask Reddit for

"ChatGPT, to finish

the Humpty Dumpty poem... Oh god..."

which complete computer generated

Using the same prompt, here's what I got.

Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall, Humpty Dumpty had a great fall. All the king's horses and all the king's men Couldn’t put Humpty together again.

In the shadows of dusk, where the darkness does creep, Lay shattered the shell, in a...