unwanted suspensions in my head

Unityx2

Half the world feels like it's on fire & it seems like the other half couldn't careless we're talking about thousands of people who've sides in the spand of two months damn near. We're watching as people are being 

forcibly removed from their home's generations upon generations erased those kids those babies they never even stood a chance & the aftermath of it all is something that words can't even begin to describe 

and to add more fuel to the fire this is happening in multiple places around the world seems like our voices aren't enough our anger isn't enough our government is supporting & aiding in all of these genocides

giving away billions of dollars doing the very opposite of what the people been asking for literally giving them more guns more ammunition locations the whole nine these countries streets are filled & paved in blood

schools, hospitals completely obliterated. In...

Emotion #5

There's no telling what I crave or what I desire maybe the answer to them both is nothing if I'm being truly honest it's been a while since I've felt any emotions maybe there's been a great disconnect there it doesn't 

bother me too much if anything it's like nostalgia familiarity even. I've felt this way since I was a kid guess the feelings enhanced overtime. Losing you,you you you you you and you & you and so many others loses and 

other things I've never spoken of I guess my internal hell and the place I called paradise is one on the same *solitude* being disconnected from everything and everybody has gotten me out of touch with a lot of emotions 

I find myself in situations where I just don't wanna be be bothered. These people aren't feeling me the irony of it all I just be minding my ugly business and someone beautiful comes along and disrupts the flow 

with bad i...

Who you?

To make a long complicated story short my name is zenkai! I was mentally born in 2k16 during the start of what he now considers the 

worst years of his life i met this man when he was 24k years old he didn't have much of nothing going on in his life at the time in his words 

it was all unnecessary bs at the time he had enrolled himself into college word on the street was he was having a kid on the way and that 

sparked his life drastically he got off his a** and went to work he had two jobs & was officially going to college then things change...

On my knees begging for forgiveness

Peace that surpasses all understanding is something I want more than anything in the world

but how do I achieve so peace? Do I pray? Do I spend the rest of my life in solitude?

do I sober up and maintain a clear mind?

How exactly can I achieve such peace?

What would I need to sacrifice in order to obtain it what exactly can I give you that don't have already?

My vanity

This is my life so why do I dought that?

Could this really be my life live or I'm I just lying to myself again

by all means I should have lost my life on a few occasions but

for whatever I'm still here I don't feel whole though

if anything I'm more empty than ever my mind grows 

silent my heart darkens by the day I may not cause trouble 

but that doesn't mean I never get in trouble 

Vanish

What does it mean to be free? 

what is freedom? 

are we really shackled and bound to this thing called life?

we're taught to respect and cherish the life we have because 

we only get one & too many people get a chance to experience it

the more I think about it the harder it is to comprehend.

Sound frame

Roses that aren't for me

Smoking on this black and mild trying to find the words

  To speak to god and to let him know what's been Going on in recent events of my life

he's probably Disappointed in me can't blame him for it through

I'm disappointed in myself to in just five month's

I lost my job, my best friend, found out that after

A year and some change that the kids that i love Aren't mine,

damn near lost my sanity, nearly drowned In depression,

almost let my anger consume me and Thought about taking my own life away

the unnecessary pain and sacrifices that I've Indore

These past few month's has taught me alot and Has shown me just how strong

i really am I've shed Countless tears ask countless questions searching For answers

as to why did i have to be the one to Indore this pain these situations

has taught me Valuable life lessons but

at the cost of my heart Being ...

seytre

 Chillin on bed and I'm missing you

Like wishing for things to go back

Normal or to my sense of normality 

I can't stand it not having you two 

I miss the days of smiles laughter 

You kept that warmth in my heart 

And your sister was the spark we cried 

And laugh in the dark but morning came

And i guess it made it better for me to weather 

The weather and storms nothing phase me nothing

Grazed me i thank god daily for these blessings

Everything was just a lesson or maybe a session

Of love that i needed and now I'm bleeding 

Internal damnged has been just  done i made yall my number one 

i love you seytre
I love you seytre 
I love you.

lets be real

If we were being real with each other you'd tell me some like you don't think that it'll be a good idea for us to be together and that you still contain some form of feelings from the past

 if we were being real with each other you'd probably tell me some like it'll never work out between us because between us something so right could only get left and I've seen what happens when I'm at best i get paid damn it i mean i get played

 if we were being honest with each other you'd probably say some like let me explain what i meant when i told you when I'm at my best i get paid yeah i get paid alright my pay day cums in the form of a bad , lies, false comment, and the rest i just get paid in change as in he said he'll change or that he has changed but things remind the same i shouldn't have to explain what i meant when i said all i do get is get played you know the game as well as i do so that j...