MyCatIsBeast

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The Problem

Life Story Part One

I Wake Up In The Morning And I Step Outside And I Take A Deep Breath, "Why Am I Still Alive?" Another Day Goes Bye, And I'm Just Waiting To Die So I Try, But I Can't Fathom Why, So I Cry, Until I Cannot Stand By My Side, Cause Inside It Just Hurts, But My Pride Makes It Worse, So I Hide And Abide By My Fragile State Of Mind, So I'm Blind To The Crime That Is My Very Life, So This Night With This Knife I Will End All This Strife. Is It Right? Do I Care? Cause I'm Living My Life, But I'm Not Living To Be Here, I Am Living In Spite, And Despite What I Write I Will Get Through The Night, And My Plight Shall Live On, So That I Do More Wrong, So I Continue To Compose Another Sad Swan Song, I Have It In Me, To Bring Myself Down On One Knee, And Take Away What Hurts Me, And Ironically That's Me, But I'm Fine Take Your Time Because I Am The Bad Guy. I'm Invisible, Deplorable, Sickening And Horrible, Degrading, Ignorable, Hell's Rei...

Self Righteous Martyr (Unfinished)

Dear God, Please Forgive Me For What I'm About To Do, But Lately I've Been Thinking Why Not Live With You, In The Sky Like You, I'll Be High Like You, Can I Die For You? Can I Confide In You, Can I Provide In Due Time This Small Crime By Quarter To Nine Is That Fine? Because Life Is Faster Than Time, And Time Has Run Out In Mine, And I Can No Longer Define The Line Between Living And Dying, I'm Running And Trying, Falling And Crying, God I'm Not Lying, What Death Is Selling I'm Buying. No Time To Explain, It Sounds Insane, But Life Is My Bane, And I Am To Blame, Because You See God, I Can Longer Handle The Pain...

Chasing Myself

"You Better Whisper Not Another Mumbled Word, This A Torture Like You've Never Seen Or Heard. It's Coming Fast You Should've Quickly Learned, Not To Be So Blind (You'll Love The Suffering I Have In Mind). I Start To Shake And I Feel So Breathless, Nothing Pointing To What Possibly Could End This. Its Closing In How Could I Not Have Seen This Coming. This Agony Of Mine, I Want To Leave It All Behind. I Want A Second Chance To Shine, There's Not A Chance To Escape This Time. It's In The Corridor Right Now Chasing Me Down, I'm Wondering Where I Could Possibly Hide Now. It's Quickly Gaining On Me, No Chance To Do What I Need To. I Feel It Pulling On Me, How Can It Grab What Is See Through As I'm Thinking What Comes Next. This Agony Of Mine, I Want To Leave It All Behind. I Want Another Chance To Shine, But I Can Tell There's No Escaping This Time. It's Has Me In It's Grasp And It Is Squeezing, The Pain Assures Me I Am Never Leaving...

Shared Anguish

I Know A Girl Who Looks For Love In All The Wrong Places,
Every Guy She Meets Is The Same Demon Behind Different Faces.
Through All Of Those Times She'd Feel Everyone's Whispered Disgraces
While Her Struggle To Find The Right One Was Shown With Visible Traces.
It's Such A Shame To See Her Mistreated, She's Broken And Bent,
Not Dead But Depleted, In Her Eyes Her Demise Is Being Completed.
No Matter What She Does The Tragic Endings Are Repeated.
Her Loud Silent Cries And Restless Eyelids, Her Known Self Violence,
She Tried To Keep Calm And Enjoy The Silence. If Only Someone Could
Help Her Ignore Her Mind's Threats. Why Does She Continue To
Decide This, All For A Sense Of Unfaultered Bliss That Isn't Cold Steel
That's Biting Her Wrists? She Keeps Walking Through Rainstorms
Only To Find A Disappeared Oasis, Chained Down To Ground Another
Victim Of Loves Lustful Poiso...

Regret

'Dedicated To A Friend Of Mine, I Hope Things Pick Up.'
She's An Angel, You're An Incorrect Angle,
She's Trying To Pull Away But You Tie
Her Heart And Mind Into A Twisted Mangle.
You Disrespect Her, And Emotionally Wreck Her,
You're Heart Is Colder Than Sweater Weather.
She Just Wants Love, But You're No Heaven Above,
You're As Cruel As Torture, And She's As Pure As A Dove.
Just Leave Her Alone, And Act Like You're Grown,
She Shouldn't Have To Say How She Feels With An Angry Tone.
She Wants To Be Happy But Your Actions Are Crappy, You Try To Guilt Her And Make Her Feel Sappy. Just Grow The F**k Up,
You're Both Over, Tough Luck, Just Please Stop Hurting Her
And Learn To Give Up. She's The Light Of Your Life But You're Just Pain And Crude Strife, Learn From YOUR Mistakes And Begin A New Life. Just Move On, She's Alre...

A Letter To Myself ( Censored )

Dear Aiden,

Look At You And All Of Your Sad Presuring Stress, You're Nothing But A Pitiful Festering Mess And If You Wanna End It Now Then Do It Be My Guest It's Easy, All You Have To Do Is Pierce That Problem Causer In Your Chest. You'll Probably Amount To Nothing Because You're Weak, Pathetic, And Disgusting And You're So Cold And That's So Old You Don't Deserve Anothers Loving. You Know That Everything You Do Sickens Everyone Including You, Just Give Up On Every Single F***ing Thing You Do Because Sitting Around Moping About Proves You Don't Even Have A Use. Do You Remember When Rich Died That Week When To Canton You Would Ride Til' 5 Because Maybe If You Would've Been At His House Instead Then He Still Might Be Alive And At The Same Time Makayla Also Left Your Side And The Only Thing You Decided To Do Was Sit Like A B****h And You Cried. Even Though She Lied You Just Wouldn't Kill Your Pride Instead You Thought That Justifying Your Spiteful A...

The Promise

I Sit And Begin Reminiscing About My Childhood And Notice, There Was A Father Missing. I Never Blamed You, I Always Blamed Another, I Even Stooped So Low As To Blame My Own Mother. It Wasn't Mine, My Sister's, Or My Brother's Fault , You Should've Taken Responsibility Because You're A Full Grown Adult. You Hurt Me Bad, But I'm Not Sad Because You're Not Here So I Hate What We Never Had. You Don't Write Or Bother To Call And Sometimes I Wonder If You Were Real At All. You Sit In My Thoughts As My Love For You Rots, The Pain's Grip Is Tighter Than My Stomach Full Of Knots. The Void Was Here With Me More Than You Ever Were, And Now That I've Stopped Thinking Your Memory Fades To A Blur.

The Healing

Funny How We Were Friends And Now This Is How It Ends, Hatred Caused By A Girl Who Spread Nothing But Bad Trends. I Guess It Doesn't Matter How Much Time With Someone One Spends, Because Now No Matter What I Do There's No Making Amends. I'm Sorry I Did What I Did And Said What I Said, I'm Sorry I Didn't Listen To What You Had To Say Instead. I Was Too Busy Trying To Help You From The Perspective Of My Head, Because Now I Know That It Was Wrong And Now Our Good Times Are Dead. I Thought I Was Doing What Was Only Right, But Instead It Caused Us To Spit Venom And Fight. At The End Of The Night, I Admit I Did Some Stuff Out Of Spite And I Apologize Because Now It's Too Late For Teary Eyes. We Weren't Blood But You Were Sure As Hell My Brother, It Doesn't Matter If You Didn't Come Out Of My Mother Because We Were Blood In My Mind I Wouldn't Have Picked Any Other, But Now It's Too Late Because Of My Heartfelt Blunder.

The Revival

Little Do You Know That This Poetry I Grow Keeps Me Going Til' The End Of The Night, Because If I Didn't Write Then Who Knows And Who Might Guess What Goes Down. It'd Be Me In A Box Colored Brown Going Into The Ground Followed By Tears And No Sound, I'd Be Wearing A Thorned Crown And On My Lap Would Be Satan's Hound Because I Know That I'm Hellbound. I Don't Care Can't Go Back Now All I Can Do Is Scream Loud About How God Won't Answer Me And Probably Thinks, " Man He's Too Damned For Me." Meanwhile I Cry And Plead Please God One More Chance For Me, "I'll Change I Swear I Will There's No Need For The Torture If I Go Nice Or Get Killed No Blood Will Be Spilled From This Day Forth I'm On A Course To Rebuild With No Source Of Evil Creed I'll Bury My Maliciousness Like A Sown Seed." It's Why I Write Or Fly Forget Ride Or Die I'll Do What I Please Before I Drown In Blood Seas. But Now I Wait For The Day Where Writing Wasn't Enough, The Day Anger Killed Without Thought And No Love....

The Pain

Twisted And Terrible These Thoughts Unbearable, The Thought Of Still Caring Makes My Heart Uncharitable. I Wanna Quit I'm Sick Of The Because If Someone Else Tells Me Whats Up, They're Getting Hit And Their Head Split With A Chainsaw I'll Cut Them To Bits Raw And Keep Their Jaw As A Souvenir Of All The Teeth I Rammed Down Their Maw For Awe. You Want To Play I'll Play Back Rough Don't Like It Then That's Tough, How Come Whenever I Say Enough Is Enough You Keep Pushing Me Further And Call It A Bluff, But When I Do It You Want Me In Cuffs Cause I'm A Bad Man And A Sad Man Who Needs To Be Helped And Locked Up. I'm Not A Bad Guy Don't Ask Me Why People Decide To Spread Lies Because When Doves Cry Then Hope Dies Just Like The Darkness On Days Where I Feel Fine, So Treat Me Different In A Better Way And You'll Find Maybe I'll Live That Extra Day And You'll Notice The Sun Has A Brighter Shine.